I’m not really one for Birthdays. My own, at least. I just don’t like the fuss which comes along with it, which is why my 20th Birthday (one month ago) was kept super quiet from you guys! I decided to do this post to honor my two decades on this planet with some life lessons I’ve learnt over the years.
“Fashion is for you and nobody else.”
Remember when your school would hold a non-uniform day in aid of a charity and you’d bring £1 to wear clothes of your choice? I would always get texts from my friends the night before like ‘what are you wearing?!’ and I’d always reply ‘oh, just jeans and a nice top’. One year, my brother, Adam, had come back from spending a year in Africa and he brought back this boho-tribal shirt and I fell in love with it. I so badly wanted to wear it and so I did. Needless to say my friends were embarrassed, my classmates found it hysterical but I loved it. Do I look back now and think “WHY did I wear that?” absolutely not. The point I’m trying to make here is, wear whatever the hell you want regardless of what everyone else thinks. I truly believe you’ll only regret the chances and risks you didn’t take.
“Surround yourself with the best people, not the most.”
This is a lesson that I wish I knew at birth. I swear, this lesson alone would have saved me a lot of sad days, during school especially! Life isn’t about who has the most friends. Do you really think that on your death bed you’re going to be wishing you had some more friends? are you f***. You’re going to think about the ones you do have. I only have a small circle of friends but we’re very, very close. They truly are my rock.
“Everything is going to be alright.”
Now, I don’t want to get all Bob Marley on you all but it will. There have been so many times I’ve thought to myself “I don’t know how I’m going to get out of this” or asked myself “what’s the point?” and after each one of these events, it’s somehow worked out. The world is a strange place but there’s a plan for you.
“Everyone deserves a second chance.”
Not everyone will agree with this one but it’s certainly something I feel really strongly about. There are gonna be people who you give chance after chance and all they do is take, take, take and these kinds of people are the ones you need to forgive and move on. Don’t let these experiences stop you from giving a second chance to someone who could better your life. Everyone makes mistakes and some time, you may need a second chance with a friend too.
“The pursuit of perfection is never ending. Quit while you’re ahead.”
I’ve got a couple of things that I was picked on for as a kid. 1) my nose and 2) my teeth. The amount of time I wasted finding out about how much a nose job would cost etc is ridiculous. I’ve made a promise to myself to not change any of these features simply because, when the first person mentioned it to me.. I couldn’t see it. I thought “my nose isn’t big is it?” “my teeth aren’t that strange are they?” and over time I began seeing myself the way that they did. I hated them with a passion. Now? I couldn’t care less. I know if I started to change myself, I’d just find other things I wasn’t happy with. Learn to love what you have been blessed with.
“Success is relative.”
Stop comparing your achievements to everyone else. Success probably means something different to me as it does to you and that’s okay.. take each step as it comes and celebrate every tiny achievement. You’re not any more or any less successful than the next person.
“Questioning is the art of learning.”
I’ve always been a very inquisitive person but only recently have I seen this as a good thing. I like to think of myself as an optimist and sometimes this is brought into question by the amount of why’s and how’s that I ask. I just love learning and understanding. The most innovative of people question everything.
“Listen to understand, not to respond.”
If a friend confides in you that they’re feeling a bit crappy, sometimes the worst answer is “yeah, but…” instead, really listen to why they feel the way they do and let them know that although you’ll never fully understand what they’re going through that you’re happy they’re offloading on to you. A simple “It must be difficult for you.” can change everything.